1. Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris. 2. Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas. 3. Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him. 4. Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night. 5. Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage. 6. When the boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. 7. Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves. 8. When Chuck Norris crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways. 9. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody 10. When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
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